Holding Hands

Last night, I had the realization that I hadn't held anyone's hand in almost 3 months, and it made me sad. No little kids grabbing my hand to walk down the street with them or pulling me to see something they had drawn or made. I miss holding hands, especially with my precious little ones in Riverside and one whom I get to see in a little over a week :)

Anyway, after my little pity party last night, God blessed me today with lots of little kids grabbing my hand, pulling on my arm, sticking their hands in my back pockets, and just touching me to be near me (or examine this white skin they may have never seen before). This blog is going to be raw processing/praying through what happened today, so feel free to stop reading here if you want. This is more for me :)

Lately, I've been praying for God to break my heart more for the lost all around me. Last week, He started answering that prayer by breaking my heart for my family who is not saved. He showed me today that His next step in breaking my heart for the lost was breaking my heart for the kids I met today. I seriously love them! Now, I know I only met them today and only hung out with them for 3 1/2 hours, but He has burdened my heart for them like I haven't felt in awhile. I would drop anything on my schedule this week to go back and see their smiling faces and tell them stories from the Word!

Another realization--I miss kids! I knew that before, but being around them today and having them tug on me, pull me, talk with me, teach me, and show me around their neighborhood--aah! that just made me realize how much I love and miss kids.

Some special moments today:
I was walking across this really unstable bridge made out of hollow wood like bamboo that didn't have nearly enough support underneath for an adult to be walking on, let alone 15 kids plus 2 adults--oh, and it was over the sea with lots of spaces in between the pieces of wood so you could watch the water right beneath you as you walked. Anyway, I was walking sideways very slowly on this "bridge" out to a woman's house that was up on stilts over the sea (for lack of a better description), and one of the little girls who I had been talking to and who was helping us carry our books, came back across the bridge, took my hand, and told me it was okay. She helped me the rest of the way across by holding my hand. So precious! She's the one in the red in this picture.

Another little girl, and I mean little, just kept walking next to me, touching me, telling me to sit down, anything to get my attention. She was a doll! At one point, all the kids got really excited to show me a "sherry" tree (I'm thinkin, this is just their pronunciation of cherries, but then I also knew we don't have cherries here, so I was curious). We got to the "sherry" tree, and immediately, 3 of the older girls started climbing to get some fruit for me to try. This little girl of course wasn't gonna climb the tree, so she kept grabbing at me to pull some of the branches down where she could reach to pick her own fruit. So cute! (And, a bonus--I felt really tall for once in my life!). (She's the littlest girl with the spaghetti strap shirt on in the center front).

This one broke my heart. This boy, who is 11 years old, has such a sweet heart and a gentle, polite personality. He quietly led us around, inserted his questions now and again when he could get me somewhat away from the mass of other kids, answered my questions about anything and everything, and just genuinely wanted to be with me and learn from me. I knew that the woman I was with had been sharing with him in her other trips to his neighborhood because we had been praying for him, so I asked him if he could remember any stories about Jesus that he had heard. He so honestly told me it had been a long time since he heard those stories so he forgot, but he seemed so willing to hear more :) I'm excited at what God is doing in his life! The part that broke my heart--he has stopped going to school. When I asked why, I couldn't understand his answer, so I asked my friend later why he wasn't going to school anymore. She told me that it's because he was getting picked on at school so badly that he didn't want to go anymore. Dagger to the heart. I so want to wrap my arms around this little boy and protect him and go to school with him and tell all the other kids how great a kid he is and that he shouldn't be picked on or beat up. But I can't. He can already read, which is a step up from many in his neighborhood--kids and adults--but I so wish he could continue schooling. He's such a smart kid! And he thinks. You can see the wheels turning. That's not a cultural norm here. They are used to being told the answers, memorizing them, and regurgitating them. Not so with him. God, save this little boy and use him in a mighty way to draw this and other nations to yourself! (He's the 2nd boy from the right in the back row).

God, please let me go back to this neighborhood! Please, save these people! Save these children! My heart longs for them to see the hope we have in you. My heart breaks for them as they continue in the cycle of hopelessness and poverty. God, move them to respond to you. Wrap your arms around these precious kids and show them that you are their Abba who will never hurt them, abuse them, or leave them, but who will always love them, embrace them, provide for them, and defend them. God, have mercy on these!